Saturday, January 30, 2010♥
must i every time put on a mask before i go out? i don't want and wish too.. dino, i will listen, i'll try to smile as long as i can take it but.. if one day i really cannot take it le please don't stop me from crying. i have enough le, really enough le. :'( running away from problem is me, cry when problem come is me! i won't face anything even how much i want i also will run. crying none stop, doing nothing but cry.. all this thing i can't stop de what. keeping thing to myself? yes it's true, as i told some of my friend before i will stop telling my feeling and some of my problem to others le not even jasmine, joanna and heidi le. i'm sorry for not saying anything to you'll. jasmine i know we promise alot of thing to each other but i'm sorry, i really can't say everything out now like i always do in the past. sometime i really won't say til you'll ask de. i don't really know what i want now also, don't really understand what i'm thinking too. thing just too messy around i can't clean up the mess by myself? no matter what i still need someone to support me.. i'm suffering with some stupid stuff here and there the others start again. when will all this fucking rubbish stop?! why must we have feeling? why must we tears when we are sad? why must i feel hurt more then love? i always thought staying with my parents i will feel more love but it's not really true. staying at home will make me stop talking and do more thinking. getting scolding everyday, this is not what i want also? although i don't love you anymore but i really do miss those day when there is nothing troubling me even there is we will also went through it no matter how hard the days is. but thing really change fast say don't love jiu really don't love le. looking at you, as a friend i'm also happy. never regret having you as my ex boyfriend. :) last long yah! hiax.. wish time past really fast for this time. i don't wanna stay at the same spot everyday. i know my temper to guy is not really good aspically to my boyfriend actually i have the same problem to every guy. being hurt of cause i don't wann treat them 100% good la. i don't want to give my whold heart and can never take it back agian. wanna heal a broken heart it's hard you know? and even how you heal it there's alway this scar at there de. just like the scar on my hand if one day it's gone maybe all my hurts will gone too? lol thinking too much le.. yesterday like that heard jinyu and sweetheart say my thing really make me think alot. am i that bad last time and now still got ma? playing around is not really what i want also de, ok.. i'm sorry to all my ex boyfriend that have been hurt by me, truly i'm sorry. actually i have some reason for hurting guy and feel that is fun or what de but anyway i'm wrong jiu is wrong, in the first place playing feeling jiu is not a very good thing le ma. hiax.. but jin yu and sweetheart say de also correct la, i'm just not the girl that every guy is looking for. only i can love you but you can't love me, force me to love you jiu will hurt deeper.. but i'm at least better then last time right? to myself i think i'm really better le. sorry say to say so much but really not feeling so good tis few days aspically today but must thanks to dino.. i didn't told him i was not in a good mood but when he talk really make me laugh. all thanks to his chicken pox! :) hahax :DD get well soon.over due picture
DRAW ME CLOSE TO YOU & NEVER LET ME GO.
Blogged @ 4:58 PM
